Growing in the New & Now
A Mini Biography on a Journey to Jesus & Motherhood
Springtime is the epitome of regeneration.
Trees are budding with new leaves. Flowers begin to bloom. The birds serenade us with their sweet melodies. As the chill and bleakness of winter end, new beginnings are all around.
It is never an easy decision to re-brand a blog. After all, over four years of memories, accomplishments, adversity, and adventure were there. Truthfully, all I wanted to do was change the aesthetics (hello type 4!). However, being as unsophisticated and un-tech-savvy as I am, I ended up creating a whole new site (yes, that was actually easier).
The clean slate and prospect of new ideals won over the nostalgia of attempting to take the time to salvage the old and familiar.
Anyway. Here we are.
The empty section was literally calling out to me to “write your first post.” I felt excited and scared and ill equipped all over again. I felt that same sense of doubt that I did over four years ago; a brand new mama, lonely and lost, and just looking for a space to share my thoughts and build a community to encourage and empower others feeling the same way.
<- How it all began. Two misfits who fell in love and never gave up. It’s so easy to see God’s hand at work in our lives now, but in the new and unknown, there were moments we felt so alone. It wasn’t until Andy was born that Mike and I really started the (sometimes painful) process of surrendering our all to God.
Now, this new season finds me as a mom of three earth bound babies and one in heaven. I am a wife of ever growing wisdom and strength. And forever and always a daughter of the Most High King. These promises are my foundation. They are innately who I am. But that’s not where my story ends.
In fact, as I ponder over my journey within motherhood, I can subtly see the curves of creation. There are these little threads that overlap and unwind, and ultimately led to this moment. Every experience and choice and action has brought me to this second right here. I feel like an endangered animal caught in a rare, quiet pocket of night that is only lit by the ghoulish glow of the screen.
But as He so often does, God took what I had thought were my plans to teach the Bible, and instead called me to live it out for my kids to see and to share what it truly means that He is Emmanuel – God with us! Because if motherhood has taught me anything, it’s that there is beauty in the surrender, that we are made perfect in our weakness. The same weakness I thought would make me the worst mom.
How it’s going ->
We have learned that marriage and parenting really are such an incredible blessing bestowed on us, and something we need to fight for daily.
For so long I have been searching for my calling, my vision, my purpose. I thought that it was always to teach or do hair. It wasn’t until I started being put out of my comfort zone as a mompreneur that I started becoming more aware of who I am and what makes me, well, me.
It should be noted, I did NOT grow up with the dream of becoming a mom. On the contrary, if you had met me even ten years ago I would have spit my tequila in your face if you dared to prophesy me as a hockey mom.
Undoubtedly, I didn’t believe I was meant to be a mom. I had thought that all my past flaws and failures defined who I was and what I was capable of. I didn’t think I deserved to be a mom. That was reserved for mentally stable and thriving individuals and I was one who tended to live in structured chaos. Who knew that was the Lord preparing me. Not I, friend.
It wasn’t until I started studying the Bible that I really started to sense my heart change. I always believed there was more out there (anyone remember that Stacie Orrico Song – the video is below so you can watch and feel old like me or discover one of my fave one hit wonders), but never knew what more there was or what it even was – if anything.
However, from the first chapters of Genesis I was captivated. For the first time I felt seen. I felt whole. And I also felt the weight of all my past choices trying to suffocate me. I won’t lie, once I made the choice to except Jesus as my Lord and savior, to truly believe He is who He says He is, I was finally able to fight to breathe. I was finally aware of the spiritual warfare that was raging before me because I had lived a life without the power of Christ.
Suddenly starved for more truth, shocked at why more people did not know these realities, I applied to Moody Bible Institute. Here I majored in Biblical Studies and truly immersed myself in the wonder and mystery of the Word. It did not disappoint.
Learning about the context, the history, the locations, the people, the culture, the meanings behind these Hebrew and Greek words – it was enchanting. And it made my mission clear – share these truths with others. Jesus himself called us to this great commission.
"And Jesus came and said to them, “All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.” Matthew 28:18-20 ESV
This story is just beginning, this journey is just starting to grow. And I would be so humbled if you would join me here, to find encouragement through the stories, studies, and social media I will be sharing every week!
While I continue to build this community, I would love for you to stay in touch! It’s super easy! Just sign up to be on my waitlist here to be the first to get notified of new posts and events and get 5 FREE scripture inspired wallpapers when you do!!
Well sisters, that’s all this mama has for now. I am so greatly looking forward to growing together. See you soon.